queer books for getting witchy woo

i'm still coming to new york probably maybe but only if i can figure out a way to leave anne's house. (they said they're gonna throw me out thursday morning... but anne MANDATORILLY has to tattoo me first and she has lots of home work... SO THEY CANT THROW ME OUT UNTILL THE TATTOO IS DONE and anne just keeps doing dumb shit like home work and school applications and going to work SO IVE BEEN LIEING ARROUND IN MY oops! caps lock problem... so ive been lieing arround in a nighty that smells like arm pit eating oranges and reading hundreds of queer books...

also i'm doing this thing where i'm a inimalist ever since i LOST EVERY THING I FUCKING OWN thanks to greyhound sending all my personal belongings to the garbage in st.louis (i have two outfits of clothes and thats only cuz i dug in the free box for a new shirt and a skirt... they lost my fucking dildo !!! and my slave bracelets, and my childhood stuffed animals, and my leather crusty miniskirt !! and my real nice duffle bag and ALL MY FUCKING UNDERWEAR EXCEPT WHAT I WAS WEARING ON THE FUCKING BUS!!!)

AHEM... so im a minimalist so all the queer books i read have to:

be read while couch surfing my freinds
be "borrowed" from freinds
be read sitting on the floor at the book store
be "borrowed" from the book store

this also ensures that i read the best queer books cuz all my freinds are fucking
queery pantses.

stone butch blues
i wish so bad that les feinberg was my mom and dad.
whats best about this book was getting a lil perspective, as in:
yeh.. being trans was a lil hard for me.. i had to struggle for acceptance and validity and respect...
but coming out in the 90s was way easier than coming out in the 50-60s and getting beaten and raped by the police once a week.
i really really wish i had more 50 sumthing trans role models to kick my ass on a regular basis...

les feinbergs other book of lectures
i didnt read the whole thing... this mighta hit me more if i read it 10 years ago... cuz i started from a way more THIRD GENDER kinda out look on things and went crazy and couldnt take it any more and finally became the boring old binary supporting lady i am now.
les is pretty big on making a point that hes more third gender and trying (for years) to be binary made his life suck hell. actually i think hes sort of female IDed still but him and katie borestien.. this book is still dope tho cuz no tranny can escape gender ish and les is so bad ass that id eat dirt if he told me to. (but just a lil bit)

gender outlaw
at first i was like... oh katie lady... this is more stuff that woulda rocked me when i was 17 but now its old shit.. then i decided it was about the level of the kind of discussions me and my sisters have when we're stoned and up late.. then we got to the middle where shes all talking about janice raymond and gender terrorism and how it really is borderline impossible to get a definition of gender that works outside of a narrow context and i was forced to go "allright.. this is kinda a lil bit bad ass" that and any time a tranny starts talking about all the nasty shit they had to deal with i get all me-too! mother-daugther complexed and its easty to get me onborad

my gender workbook
that said tho.. i'm not doing this one..
i ran this by a few other trans kids and they where like "meh... thats more like a book you buy yer siblings.. and then only if they're a lil bit hippy liberal..."

macho sluts
i just started reading this book of queer SM fiction and its fucking awsome.. butch dyke hustlers in a matriarchal appocalypse ?!?!?! fucking hell yes !! this is crappy of me but i'm really glad pat calfia is a guy now cuz the pic of him as a butchie lessie on the back cover just wasn't flattering at all.... mostly cuz he had a terrible fucking blonde crappy haircut while wearing all bondage leather. and now he keeps it short.

pat did the closing speech last year at filthdelphia tranny con and i started crying when he started sequeing about how trannys have sometimes been regarded in history as special magic beings and we should try to get back to that status..

just for the record i was crying cuz it struck me that BULLSHIT! i dont want to be a magic sage medicine woman or anything. i dont want to wish that i was magic in society, cant i just be average in society? suggesting i should be wishing i was special makes me feel like i'm over doing it when i could just be normal cuz i fuckiong deserve to be normal.

y'know... not that me and my brothers and sisters ARN'T special and magic.. cuz we are.we are special magic creatures who are different and just a lil tiny bit better than the normals. and part of our special magic is our secrets damn it.. i just dont need that to be our role in society.. do y' know wut i mean here??

anyways.. butch dyke hustlers trash talking their social workers and pining over the loss of they're old lovinbgly abusive punk ass girlfreind whos dead... thats almsot as hot as

cities of nightthis book doesnt count cuz
i actually read this book by John RIECHY a bunch of years ago... its about a faggot hustler who drifts from town to town hanging out with hustlers and queens and trying to find validation in the arms of a man who has the guts to love him and not just buy him and be a real honest unaffected man and not a insecure fairy. i need more dirty street life sex novels ! written by people who fucking know the life!!!! this is whati wanna read

like that lynn breedlove book
about the bike messanger dyke with the speed habit and the stripper girlfreind who dumps her for being a shitty head case... i only read 3 chapters but i was way in to it... i gotta go stay at vega's house for a few days again so i can finnish it.

do thees books count ?? cuz they're fucking punk and queer but doi they get me QUEER THEORY POINTS ??!? somebuddy tell me cuz i'm only doing this for the queer theory points.. what else..?

the anarcho feminist reader
i read two chapters and i cant remember shit...

...shit, i really can't.

zine put out by DORIS on how to support yer freinds who've been through abuse and still be affected by same... its not complicated but it gives me more better person skills..

from margin to center
i picked this as the book that is gonna make me understand femminism. the first time i picked it up last year i was "meh" cuz i wanted my intro to femminism to be more angry and militant.. now ive actually read a few chapters tho and i'm less ignorant enuff to actually get something out of it. like ive got to stop hating on people who like their families cuz the only reason i hate my familly is cuz i had sufficent class privilage to grow up in a familly that had all its charector and personality shaped and mangled by modern western consumerist patriarchal society. so my families privilage made it shitty. which is utterly true. HOW THE FUCK ABOUT THAT.?!?!

FOR FLAVOURING... i cant remember what i read but i liked most of the articles most of the time.. i think i read one about renne richards that i rember being ok..

some zines and some other books
before i leave town i gotta go stoop at the wooden shoe for an afternoon in the queerfeminismgender section soem more... i tried to read a bunch of books about black radicalism and spanish anrchy but i just cant cram them in to my brains.

so thats where im at so far. i never read any of this shit before. did you hear that? I NEVER READ ANY QUEER OR GENDER THEORY OR FEMINIST STUFF EVER BEFORE


for serious... i cant really say why beyond that i thought it was a bunch of smarty pants stuff for theory addicts to talk about at school together. like i know i'm not dumb but this shit really went right over my head untill only very recently...

except for city of night.. and maybe one of those early JTleRoy stories from before he was TRAJICLY KILLED BY ANGRY CATS AND DOGS. ACTUALLY i wish id read stoine butch when it came out... i wouldnt have cuz it was about a guy and i'm a girl and i'm dumb like that but if i could travel back in time and force me to read it i woulda loved it... everything else can wait... i might have liked macho sluts but once again its not about me so i dunno.

oh wait.. there was this one book i read once about a tranny girl whore from toronto named alexis. her book was awsome just cuz i never read any gritty queer tranny girl stories before and it got me all interested in whoring when i was 25.

i really really wish there was more gritty tranny girl stories, damn it. (cuz JTleRoy was torn to tiny peices by cats and dogs and writes kinda shitty half the time and is dead)... and miss borenstien is writing more theory kinda stuff.

how bout sandy stone? whats her writing like?

what i wanna read is the girl version of stone butch.


I tried to sit down and write my own short story faked out autobiography a few months ago but
-i'm a shitty writter

cuz i got some awsome hot drama and dirt but i'm still living in it so i gotta shut up for now.

but anyways.

there ougta be such a book.


YEP. A Library Gallery of ancient Trans Rants from back when i was young and angry. Thank to the Bio-s for trammpling my will and spirit !!
With my soul crushed I can now function as a blank eyed drone in society and not cause any trouble!!
yay !! I'm so emotionless with no soul and I'll never feel again !!!

THIS WAS WRITTEN years ago when i was young and sensitive (now i'm old and jaded). Fuck off with the hurt feelings hate mail. Stop disagreeing with me or i'll ride my bike to your town and hit you. Alot.

MY diary is really gross and embarasing.

I think this link goes to the index but I havent tried it.